Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Writing for myself....

I think I have discovered writing as an outlet of expression and accountability for me. I started this blog to keep myself motivated and happy because I just wasn't feeling it. So you will probably see some "off the wall" posts or think I post too much. You have the option not to read abut the thoughts going on in my head. Trust me, it won't hurt my feelings. I am one tough cookie. (Well, 99% of the time, I do have my moments of weakness)

So, let's start off with an update on the list. I have started my book list with: "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" and "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone". I enjoy reading multiple books at a time. It gives me a break if one of the books is dragging for me.

Trimming the Fat
This is certainly an amusing title, considering the person I am referring to. Once I write about this, I'm not going to talk about it anymore. I don't have time to waste on petty bullshit.

I celebrated my birthday with a small group of friends. I was selective on who I invited and there were reasons why each of them were invited. These are the people who are near and dear to my heart for some reason or another. These are the people I would do almost anything for. I had an awesome drama-free night. We had dinner, than went to a bar close to where we all live. We had drinks, took fun pictures and had a great time socializing. This was forward to Tuesday.

I posted pictures of the great time we had on Facebook.

Today, one of my "friends" posted on her status 'now that's a slap in the face,' then about 10 minutes later I receive a text message saying 'So, we aren't friends anymore?' and this started a whole conversation about how she always reaches out to me, but I never respond. She didn't ask me to do anything for my birthday. She simply asked me what I was doing. I told her dinner and guess what...we did go to dinner! And it was super yummy and I love Pizza Shoppe! She brought up that I was with one of my friends (the one she had a major conflict with) on New Year's Eve. She didn't ask me to do anything on New Year's what's the big deal? Am I not allowed to socialize? She thinks I purposely posted pictures to hurt HER feelings. Oh, sweetheart, it's not about you. No, I posted the pictures for myself and the friends that were sharing the night with me. I didn't do anything to hurt her feelings, nor have I ever. I haven't even been mean to her...still! I have no reason to e. She needs to reflect on her life and figure out why she keeps losing her friends. It's not the other people. It is HER. She is the one losing one friend after another. Why she thinks she can treat people the way she does and why she thinks she can say hateful and cruel things and not have negative consequences to it. You have to be mindful of what you say. Every action has an equal reaction. The conversation ended with me saying "I'm sorry you felt that way". Honestly, it feels like some sort of weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I don't have to worry about that drama anymore!
After our conversation, she posted on facebook "it's really hard to come by quality people and quality friends" Are you that desperate for sympathy and attention that you lower yourself to the high school brand of cyber bullying?

I know I am a quality person and a quality friend. No one can tell me different.

That is the story of a break-up that I am certainly not sad about. It's been a long time coming. I'm not sorry I was friends with you. I did enjoy hanging out with you and having fun. We are in different places in our lives. I am not going to apologize or even respond to your comments or hurtful things you are saying about me to others. I know the truth and I know which friends are there to keep.

I think this meets part of simplifying my life. Even though, I am sure this wasn't exactly what I meant.

"The past is gone, the future is not yet here, and if we do not go back to ourselves in the present moment, we cannot be in touch with life" -- Thich Nhat Hanh

One snippet of advice: Get in touch with reality and when things happen, you will be able to deal with them in the correct way.

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